I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize