NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
