Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I believe in your delicious
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
