we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
how does that bad decision feel?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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