She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
the gays at disneyland are vicious
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
