You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
