That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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