The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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