She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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