i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize