What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
