Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Define "chronic" masturbator.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
