uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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