hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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