i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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