his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I lost the right to judge tonight
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
and you fell through a lawn chair
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