that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
He kissed a someone with a penis
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
