No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
