It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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