Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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