I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
