She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
