Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
