I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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