do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
