I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
