Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
