why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Houston, we have a blender
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
