You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
