arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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