i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
We left an ass print on the piano.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize