I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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