problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
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