How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I want to fling myself into the sun
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize