I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
