oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
