no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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