Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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