my mouth tastes like poor choices
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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