tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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