That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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