I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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