I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
