i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
