So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
