You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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