he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Vodka?
Forever.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
