there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
