Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Randomize
