also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
