I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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