Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
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